Guess I’m staying away so I don’t have to think
So I don’t have to think.
I almost cried,
Swear to God I almost did.
I’m not so special anymore, think I’m just kinda here.
Change my Clothes, change my face, and my hair, and my wieght,
Still can’t stand to be around a goddamn mirror.
I’m not so special anymore,
Never even had the right.
All those cruel things I said that make you forget my light
I don’t think I have much light.
I don’t think I have much of anything in me anymore.
Guess I’m sad so I think I can write.
What a confusing thing,
What terrible fright.
Please make use of me, please just put up a fight.
I find no comfort in a soul anymore,
Think I’m scared I never might.
It’s becoming aware that I am once again a child
Stand in the cold waiting for a ride.
Spend my money on anything that will end my night
Being selfish again, but I love you so much
You’re the only living creature whose love I’ve believed was just
You have no use, there is no point in lying to me.
Don’t cringe away, don’t go away from me. I can be beautiful again, I can be normal again, you’ll see.
Maybe I’m just dreaming, maybe I’m just full of shit
I just think there is more, I am just not grasping it.
Guess what I’m trying to say is I’m fading away and I know it’s nothing new.
I know I did this to myself
I am so jealous of you.
The only thing I’m good at is sleeping, drinking, and talking shit.
I expect everyone to get used to it.